Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
