So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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