the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Randomize
