You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
NoShamevember. You game?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
