I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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