i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The air was thick with penises
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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