I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize