john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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