So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
