i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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