We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize