My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
