Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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