But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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