1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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