Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
