How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
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