me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
