I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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