she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
