Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
