I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
