He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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