Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
