Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
