Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
only you would photoshop your dick
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
