You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
