The maid of honor just puked.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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