my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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