Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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