well I can't set my house on fire every night
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
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