I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize