i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
