i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
