fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
