I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
