I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
