Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
