That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
