Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
