i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
