Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize