Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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