I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
