I like my sex mixed with concussions.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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