did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
