I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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