FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
