What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
