We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
